Why are you keeping me up every night? There have been many sleepless nights filled with uncontrollable tears, however you shine so brightly in these dark hours. When you show up, I wonder what I'm doing with you. What exactly are you attempting to teach me? I've always wondered why you linger so long upon my experience with you. I've attempted it all to numb you, but it hasn't worked and it doesn't appear that it ever will. I wipe tears from my eyes and choose to confront you with all of my fortitude. I realised you'd never leave until it was transformed into something else.
So how?
Pain:‘here I am’
Me:‘leave’
Pain: ‘No’
Me: ‘what do you want? ‘
Pain: ‘I need you to look at me’
Me:‘it hurts’
Pain: ‘you are hurting me’
Me:‘you chose me’
Pain: ‘you get to choose what to do with it’
Me: ‘I choose to transform’
Pain:‘in to what?’
Purpose: ‘into me’
Pain:‘why’
Purpose: ‘with you I have learned to look deeper’
Pain: ‘into the wounds I have created?’
Purpose:‘into whom I truly am’
Pain:‘who are you?’
Purpose: ‘I am strong’
Pain: ‘but I make you cry....’
Purpose: ‘you made me bold’
Pain: ‘You ought to resent me’
Purpose:‘I love you’
Pain:‘How... Why?’
Purpose:‘I learned many things from you’
Pain: ‘to hate life?’
Purpose: ‘no, to love and appreciate life’
Pain: ‘what is there to love and appreciate while I still reside in you?’
Purpose: ‘you make me want to make a difference’
Pain: ‘By hurting others?’
Purpose: ‘by empowering others’
Pain: ‘You’re going to lose’
Purpose: ‘I found me --- Purpose’
I gently close my teary eyes and return back to sleep knowing all will be well in the morning.
